2 Timothy 1:7 – For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.
Sweaty palms, your heart beating at a crazy rate, feeling paralyzed in the moment, the urge to run, crying, or even screaming. These describe some of the many things that may come with fear. I know all of us have dealt with fear at some point in our lives. The question is who do we run to when we are faced with fear?
When I was younger I ran to my mother, grandparents, or a sibling to get the reassurance that everything was going to be okay. Now that I am older I sometimes will turn to my husband for reassurance. Then there are those times when the reassurance of a loved one just doesn’t work.
A couple of months ago, I went through a time like this when I could not get the feeling that things were going to be okay. I had a flare up with my multiple sclerosis (MS). My eyes were impacted. As a result of my MS, I have something called optic neuritis. So, literally over the course of a day, I lost my eye sight in one eye. My worst fear had come to life.
I began to cry and realized I couldn’t even cry out of one eye. I grew frustrated and sick to my stomach. My family tried to give me words of comfort, but I didn’t find comfort. It was not until I turned to God and began to pray that I found comfort. I began to feel the warm embrace of the Holy Spirit across my face and in my heart. I knew that my sight would be restored.
I went to my eye doctor and they told me this flare up had caused permanent damage to my eye. I was not sure what that meant. I immediately thought that I would be blind in one eye forever. Again, myriad emotions began to rise in me. I had to catch myself before I was consumed with fear.
I took my power back! I prayed to God again and began to feel a sense of peace. I was reminded that God had not given me the spirit of fear, but he gives us the spirit of peace. Fear is the one thing the enemy has. He wants to try and destroy us and make us respond to life’s challenges with a range of emotions not grounded in our faith.
Thank for You allowing me to see another beautiful day. I appreciate all the wonderful support my loved ones give me. I ask that You help me turn to You in my time of need. Help me to always remember You and not to give in to the spirit of fear, but embrace power, love, and self-discipline.